Darker Shades of Blue

She was once the brightest white
Until someone came and painted her blue.
The melancholy swept through her being.
Time passed and she grew indigo.
For long she’s been suffering from her transition.
And so she decided to end it…

She chose to be as black as oblivion
So she won’t be transparent.
She grasped to embrace darkness
So no one could see through her core;
Thus, no one could ever hurt her anymore.

She surrounded herself with poison
So no one would try to verge upon her wall
Nor try to ask her what’s wrong,
Because even herself cannot explain
What her pith’s trying to say.

She hid the sparkle—as small sa firefly’s butt inside her
So that no predator could ever
be attracted to it and thrash it.
After all, that little light is her only chance
To find her way back to her lost self,
And mend her tainted lost soul.

– M.R.A.

To The New Moon Who Was Once My Full Moon

We used to bond over heavenly bodies
You’re captivated by the moon
And I’m in love with the stars and constellations
You used to whisper your dreams to meteors
While I’m all irked before you see the Ursa Major
We used to talk about mysteries and galaxies
But never did I realize that just like black hole—
our universe condensed into a singularity—
like a collapsing massive star that soon turned into void
That our pride is a black hole that even our love—
as passionate as the burning sun—
cannot escape.

– M.R.A.

I Still

I still think of you whenever I look at the moon
I still remember you whenever I hear our song
I still write your name on the window’s moist
I still yearn to hear your voice

I still look for you in the crowd
I still see myself waking up in your arms
I still read your horoscope after I read mine
I still pine since I’ve lost you in my life

I still imagine our life together
I still wonder what you are doing every hour
I still think of you as my true love
I still wish at 11:11 to have you back

I still hate you for depleting my core
I still miss you even after all the torture
I still feel messed up when it comes to you
I still feel my stomach churn when I think of you

I still try to forget you
I still try to let go
I still love you
But I’m trying real hard not to.

– M.R.A.

Sorry

“Sorry”, is what I wanted to say
I love you
But it’s not that deep
For me to stay
Sorry
But I just can’t love you
Like before
My feelings
Are not enough anymore

– M.R.A.

Rain, Rain, Go Away

The rain is pouring from the sky,
Like waterworks streaming down my cheeks as I cry
The nature is with me,
Piercing through the core of my psyche,
Whispering,
“I’m with you. I know what you’re going through.”

But that doesn’t stop me from weeping,
The rain is so disheartening.
I winded up pitying myself,
Thinking,
Only breeze is there to offer its hand,
While all and sundry doesn’t seem to understand.

I feel stuck in the heave,
Cold while my eyes are heated.
Ruminating the past,
Forlorn in my room gloomed like dusk.
Grasping that I’m wretched
Waiting till this rainy day ends.

– M.R.A.

So Deep, Adelle Can’t Even Roll In It

Saddest night of my life. So far. A bit exaggerated but it is so sad that it could literally break my heart. Well, not literally, I take that back because that’s too much sounding it like a lie already. Just sad that it makes me publish this nonsense blab to be posted on this wall that will be soon read by you my friend who just wasted 5.8962 seconds of your life. The saddest part is, your time is already wasted scrolling and scrolling on your feeds, liking posts, stalking people, bone-idling, maybe smiling with some stupidly funny pics, blog, and stories, and even setting aside your pending works just to poke your nose into someone’s business.
I don’t know why i’m saying these dopey things. I don’t know why i keep on typing. And i don’t know why you are still reading this which had just consumed 10.489 seconds of your wasted life. Sorry not sorry dude. But the thing is, my dummy fingers wrote this moronic thoughts made possible by my gullible muscles commanded by my nerves signaled by my cloudy mind that is caused by my noob broken heart. Shame on me being sad because of some jerk right? Knowing that millions of people will be sleeping tonight with empty stomachs and defiled hopes, and some may even breathe their last breaths. The thought makes me even wearier. Life is just so unfair. But fairer enough to make everyone’s life unfair.

Free Fall

You’re my dream
That I wished to catch
You’re the dream
I never failed to watch
I fell
I held
But you never grasped.

– M.R.A.

Waterworks

Heavy hearts
Like heavy clouds
Are best calmed
Through waterworks
Burned from your eyes.
So let your tears flow
For wherever they go
Your sorrows follow.
Let your tears emanate.
Let them water your soul
For it will flourish
Your dried depth like rainbows.

-M.R.A.

Lost

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Out of all the things I lost.
I miss my heart the most.
You took it with you.
Broke it into pieces
And left me nothing
But a breathing corpse.

– M.R.A.

Broken

Love really hurts
It’ll turn your heart into pieces
Make your emotion sick
And make yourself drown with bleed.

I don’t know how to move on
Nor to be whole again
How I wish I can make all my anguish fade
And forget all those memories
I thought I can treasure.

Every time I remember all those
Sweet moments we shared
All I can do is weep and cry
It’s enough to describe what I feel
For what’ve you done to this no heal pain.

Now you prove that promises were made to be broken,
And that made all my dreams evaporate then.
I love you is what you always say,
But then doomsday happened and left me all the way.

How can you be so cruel?
It feels like my life is ruined.
I wonder when’s the time I can say “I’m okay”,
Without being called a liar.

You’re now my past that made me tough.
I know one day I’ll be completely fine,
I’ll pick up the shattered pieces of my heart and love again
Someone who’s worthy to replace your spot
In my once broken heart.

– M.R.A.